OSAGE BEACH, Mo. -- I'll confess: I've never gotten into the whole boating thing at Lake of the Ozarks. I don't fish. I don't own a boat or know how to operate one.
Thus, I'd been to the Lake of the Ozarks only twice, both for short visits with no time spent on the lake.
All that changed recently when my husband, two sons and I spent a long weekend at the lake, and even (gasp!) on a boat.
There's no doubt the lake, created by Union Electric Co. in 1931, is the main draw for the 3.5 million or so people who will come this summer to enjoy its miles of shoreline. But I found much more to do "at the lake," than actually being "on the lake."
TAN-TAR-A
The Lake of the Ozarks area is home to three big full-service resorts: the Lodge of the Four Seasons, with beautiful landscaping and stunning views; Camden on the Lake, an upscale newbie with some of the most gorgeous rooms I've stayed in; and Tan-Tar-A, which is known as a family fun destination. It's also the one place I had not stayed on my previous visits.
We chose a two-bedroom cottage on the lake. Though the decor inside was a bit dated, it was the scenery outside, along with the ample deck, that made this a perfect location for our family weekend. With a kitchen in our room and a Burger King a short walk away, we loved eating breakfast on our deck, watching the ducks, geese and squirrels mingle below us.
Our boat captain, Omer Clark, called Tan-Tar-A a city unto itself, and he wasn't kidding. With two pools (the main one overlooks the lake and has a large slide), an indoor waterpark called Timber Falls (similar to those at the Great Wolf Lodges and the Grand Bear Resort in Utica, Ill.), horse-riding stables, golf, an arcade, a bowling alley, five restaurants, a playground, a marina (where you can catch Clark's Tropic Cruise or rent jet skis and more) and a beach area, you really don't have to leave the resort.
OFF THE RESORT
However, we wanted to explore the area a little better than I'd been able to do on previous trips, so we ventured off the resort.
Bridal Cave at Thunder Mountain Park: At first glance, Bridal Cave (admission $8-$16) looks fairly unassuming. After you head through a gift shop and down some stairs, you see a small hole with a barred door in a cliff. Your guide unlocks the door and you step into a room full of quartz, stalagmites, stalagtites, columns, drapery and soda straws (all terms our guide taught us). Then you begin your real journey, through narrow passageways and tunnels into rooms so amazing they will take your breath away. Couples get married here (thus the name) and Osage Indians coaxed music out of the stone formations years ago. The last stop is a stunning lake that's worth the hour-long tour to get to the back of the cave. Don't forget to stop at the gem shop on your way out. More info: bridalcave.com
Main Street Music Hall: Without kids, it's easy to find something to do in the evenings at the lake: find a bar with a great band. With kids, we looked for something more subdued. We found the Main Street Music Hall's Main Street Opry ($10-$19), a comedy and music show. Parts of it were outstanding, particularly Wendy Warner's Michael Jackson impersonation and her "Beauty and the Beast" duet with Travis Spratt. More info: lakemusichall.com.
Miner Mike's and Buster's: I think my kids could have played at this 35,000-square-foot indoor play center all day. In addition to high-tech token-operated video games, you'll find a mini roller coaster, Ferris wheel and bumper cars. There is also a huge maze with tunnels, slides, a ball pit and ball launchers. You can get entry to the maze and unlimited rides for $14 per child (one adult can ride free with a child). More info: minermikes.com
Dining: Dining at Lake of the Ozarks has been fairly hit or miss for me. We did find two places this time worth a mention. The first is Bentley's, 3100 Bagnell Dam Boulevard, which recently added a stone patio with a fireplace overlooking the lake. We sat in the main dining room, which takes its decor from upscale British pubs. I had perfectly cooked red snapper with a hint of orange remoulade ($20.95), while my husband loved the signature prime rib ($29.95 for 18 ounces with salad and side). We also enjoyed lunch down the road in Lake Ozark at Baxter's Lakeside Grille, 2124 Bagnell Dam Boulevard, where we sat on a beautiful patio watching turkey vultures swoop around us while dining on a grilled swordfish sandwich with tomato, fresh mozzarella and basil on ciabatta bread ($12.99) and blackened shrimp salad with feta cheese and mango-pineapple salsa ($10.99).
Spa: Even moms need a little break on a family weekend, so I figured a massage was in order. My husband took the kids to play bumper boats and go-karts (there is no shortage of those) while I headed to Spa Shiki at the Lodge of the Four Seasons. Named the best spa in the Midwest for 2012 by Spa Magazine, Spa Shiki is a full-service salon with a few extras that make it special. It has a mosaic-tiled saltwater whirlpool in a serene setting next to a lovely meditation room with all the right pipe-driven nature music and ambient lighting. The spa also features an indoor/outdoor swimming pool, steam and infrared saunas, a fitness facility and a juice bar, where I got a sample of a yummy carrot-apple-lime juice, and complimentary tea and fruit. Guests receiving spa treatments may use the spa facilities on the day of their treatment. The Swedish massage ($90 for 50 minutes) was everything I had expected and a perfect way to unwind, which, after all, is what you are supposed to do on vacation. More info: spashiki.com
BACK TO THAT BOAT
With no boating skills, we decided to let someone else do the driving. That someone was Omer Clark, who also has a home in St. Charles.
His Tropic Island Cruises (tropicislandcruises.com) runs a 150-person luxury motor yacht that also does charter cruises. It's a beautiful boat, and most important, has a full-service bar on the upper deck. He picks up tourists six days a week at 3 p.m. at Tan-Tar-A for a 90-minute narrated tour of the lake ($10-$16).
When I asked him what the allure of the lake was, he said simply: "It's just a great view. The sunsets, the moons, it's beautiful."
As I sat on the bow of the ship, on a perfect 75-degree day with the wind blowing in my face, water spraying up occasionally around me and my arms wrapped around my two boys, I have to say, I finally started to understand the allure of being "on the lake."
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